Posted in Leadership, success

23 things that will mess up your life

It’s pretty easy to mess up our lives. It’s very difficult not to, in fact. Everybody can look back and point to choices they regret.

From childhood we are inclined to resist the guidance of our parents who are doing their best to look out for us and prevent us from our own ruin.

It’s good to learn early on that we cannot have everything we want because some of the things we want are not good for us. It is only as we train our desires that we begin to want the things that are going to give us a good future.

Over the years I have watched many people make bad choices. I have observed that it is easier to prevent a mistake than to correct it later.

I find it painful to watch people make choices that I know will mess up their lives. Most of the time I can’t prevent them.

I’ve decided to write this article in the hope that someone might want some coaching on how not to mess up their lives.

What will mess up your life?

  1. You will mess up your life if you are a follower. If you don’t have the strength to abide by your convictions and say, no, then you are going to do things you will regret later.
  2. You will mess up your life if you refuse to think about how daily decisions will affect your future.
  3. You will mess up your life if you don’t discern which people want the best for you. Some people really don’t care if you mess up. They have made bad choices and want company. They want to drag you down with them.
  4. You will mess up your life if you don’t have a vision for the life you want to have. Without this you will be without a roadmap. You will be making decisions based on the moment and on how you feel.
  5. You will mess up your life if you are afraid to stand out from the crowd and be different. Sometimes going against the crowd will mean that you will stand alone.
  6. You will mess up your life if you defy your conscience. There is a still small voice inside us that often warns us of danger and sometimes makes us feel an apprehensive guilt. It’s good to listen to your gut feeling.
  7. You will mess up your life if you rely on your peers for guidance. Most likely your peers are struggling with the same things you are. In order to keep from messing up your life you will need to look for role models who have more life experience.
  8. You will mess up your life if you fill your mind with garbage. Garbage is anything that does not move you in the direction of your goals. You need to develop a strong sense of what is worthy of your goals and what is beneath them.
  9. You will mess up your life if you allow any addiction to overpower you. Addictions are very expensive and always take a toll the take on our finances, our relationships and our health. Do not let them have this power over you.
  10. You will mess up your life if you think too highly of yourself and your abilities and if you think to lowly of yourself. Develop a healthy understanding of yourself in relation to others. See others as being of equal worth.
  11. You will mess up your life if you are prone to violence or violent outbursts. Others do not deserve your wrath. The deserve your patience and understanding.
  12. You will mess up your life if you think only about yourself. The most fulfilling life is a life spent with consideration for the needs of others. Treat others the way you want to be treated.
  13. You will mess up your life if you refuse to learn. Learning means studying and listening to others with more knowledge and experience. Be a truth seeker.
  14. You will mess up your life if you are not discerning. Discernment means you can see consequences before they happen. It also means you see the motivation behind things, like advertising, for example. Discernment will help you understand what is for your good and what is not and why this is so.
  15. You will mess up your life if you cannot put the welfare of others ahead of your own welfare. This is especially true if you seek an enduring relationship and want to have a family.
  16. You will mess up your life if you habitually lie. Others will not be able to trust you.
  17. You will mess up your life if you steal. You do not show respect for the property of others. This also applies to vandalizing the property of others.
  18. You will mess up your life if you do not know how to manage your sexual desires and impulses. This is probably the least talked about subject because it is so personal. A sense of entitlement will result in making destructive choices.
  19. You will mess up your life if you avoid obligation and responsibility. One of the key obligations is to manage your finances by having an income and realizing that you are responsible for providing for yourself for the rest of your life.
  20. You will mess up your life if you engage in criminal activities.
  21. You will mess up your life if you borrow beyond your ability to pay it back. Borrowing has to be considered very carefully because it can quickly turn into crippling debt that will limit your ability to meet your obligations and have the things that are important in your life.
  22. You will mess up your life if you refuse to apologize. Everybody makes mistakes and we need to own up to our mistakes.
  23. You will mess up your life if you do not clean up after yourself. Cleaning up after yourself shows respect for your environment. You will respect yourself and others will respect you if you look after your surroundings.

There is a lot of value in simply being a decent citizen and not messing up what you have been given. Life is not so much about climbing the ladder of success as it is about being a contributing member of society. It is about taking time to think about how we are impacting our future, the lives of our loved ones, and our planet. We only get one round at life. Let’s not mess it up.